Sweet Stuff

 

Food has been one of the major mishaps of my life, yes I mean that quite literally. I eat way too much than my body needs, and this has been keeping me down for quite a long time.

I’m not excruciatingly obese to the point where I can’t get out of bed, but for sure I could lose a lot of weight, no doubt whatsoever.

Personally, I’ve thought this through and through, and I always come up with the same interpretation as to how much I eat of course, and it isn’t something mind blowing or spectacularly psychological, but the reason for my over-eating is the simplicity of the fact that I love the taste of food, way more than the regular person. Just the sensation of good (junk) food breaking down in my mouth, gives my euphoric sensations (which is a bad thing thinking about it now).

I wouldn’t classify myself with those who would say that the reason they overindulge in food or ‘binge-eating’ is due to some personal dysfunction or as a coping mechanism to fight something off, a way to forget some things that an individual might be going through. Don’t get me wrong, that’s quite harsh when a person truly suffers from this, and it can be a huge pain to overcome this on a psychological level. Many obese people fall for this due to many complications, and this is an actual disease, which can be very hard to overcome.

Whenever I’d have an overwhelmingly delicious meal, or any kind of sweet savoury mouth watering type of food, I feel bad. I don’t feel bad for eating, but I feel bad because I can do better. I’m not one of those who thinks that being ‘fat’ or ‘overweight’ is okay, no, I think it’s something that anyone can get out of with the right amount of work and the perfect suitable diet for his/her needs.

Often times I think I give this ‘excuse’ of simply loving how food taste as a shield to fend myself off the reality that I need to exercise more, I need to eat healthier, I need to eat cleaner, etc.

This notion of being fat by choice has only kept me down for a long time. I have to change, I mean, I always find myself thinking, ‘is it really THAT hard to get my ass off the couch and go for a run, or to join a gym?’. The answer is simple, no it’s not that hard.

I’ve delt and been through alot in my short existence of twenty-one. By hell, I won’t let the excess fat on my body, that was my own doing, to keep my down anymore.

I’ll go as far as saying that this is not okay. I don’t want to be accepted in a society in the way that I am now. This is one of the harshest mistakes and wrongdoings caused by political correctness. Being fat and obese shouldn’t be celebrated. Being lazy shouldn’t be celebrated, and yes, I’m applying this to my own self. I won’t find any excuses anymore for being a lazy, food junkie that doesn’t want to better himself. I’m better than this, I’m better than all this crap I keep shoving down my throat. I’m not falling for the oh so standards of society in terms of fitness. I’m not one of those who shout ‘yeah! It’s okay to be fat! Rock that body you go, random fat person!’. That’s wrong and on so many levels I’ve come to realize. Being fit and healthy isn’t a ‘social construct’, it’s the only sane choice a human being can make in order to have a healthy and lasting existence.

No more excuses. I will become a better person, not for society, not for anyone else, but for myself.

I’ll try my best, and I will fight as hard as it takes, to achieve my goals, and to lose all this heaviness that I inflicted upon myself.

All that sweet stuff, I’ll have to put on hold. Time for change.