I came to a haunting realization today: Everyone around me is in love, except me. There’s this thing about me, where I simply can’t fall in love anymore. I tried, believe me I did. But I’ve reached the breaking point. Rejection after rejection, heartbreak after heartbreak, I couldn’t bear it anymore. I try to fall in love, I convince myself that I’m in love, but I’m just hustling myself, playing tricks on myself. I’m sick and tired of sleeping around. I’m an old soul, nothing excites me more than the idea of settling down and finding just that one right person. Times have changed, and people laugh at me for actually have such a desire in life.
“It’s too early for that! You’re still young, man! Go out and enjoy yourself, see what the world has to offer!”
I saw what the world had to offer, and it wasn’t pretty. It was boring, unsatisfying, and unfulfilling. You see, as clichéd as it is talking about this generation moving on from the idea of love, I still find it fascinating. Being a romantic in this day and age can be laughable to some, because you know, ‘progressiveness’ is somehow related to feelings, in the weirdest and strangest of mannerisms.
I just seethe and take a deep breath whenever I have this conversation with anyone really. It gets tiring defending and repeating myself all the time. I guess I just have to deal with it.
You know, the thing is about my old soul, is that finding that special person like I said before is even tougher now. Again, times have changed, and no person is interested in settling in early and building up a life together at a younger age. This is what I strive for, and I’ll always will.
I know dear reader you might find me being paradoxical when I started out this meaningless, yet relieving plethora of ramblings with the notion that everyone around me is in love. What I’m trying to get through is the basic tenant of commitment. Commitment is what I’m aiming for here. No one has the patience and the balance to truly get to know a person. In this speed age as I like to call it, everything moves quick, just like emotions and romances, and thus, I make my case.
All I can do is hope that soon enough, I’ll find the right person. Patience is key they say.